|
|
Post by hypnotator on Aug 31, 2004 9:37:15 GMT -5
 “Good afternoon, students. My name is Doctor Walder and I am your tutor for today’s anatomy lesson. I would like to introduce my assistant, Nurse Klimt, and our brave volunteer for the session, Frank.  “Frank has kindly agreed to take part today because he desperately needs the funds in order to complete his council tax payments. Indeed, he has fearlessly agreed to allow us to perform surgery without an anaesthetic, provided we give him a couple of quid extra from the money saved.  “Firstly, Nurse Klimt will be using our new state-of-the-art high-speed drill attachment to access Frank’s frontal chest cavity. Note that a minimal amount of blood loss occurs when the latest technology is applied with appropriate expertise and a steady hand. Steady, nurse!  “Now we are able to remove the front section of Frank’s ribcage and access that most vital of vital organs, the heart. I must commend you, nurse, on your tidy cutting. Students please note how the heart continues to palpitate vigorously despite its isolation from the rest of the body.  “Now we have exposed the patient’s brain, and we can use this handy turbine attachment to administer a cool breeze to his cerebellum. Summer breeze makes me feel fine, blowin’ through the jasmine in my mind. Aah, how refreshing.  “Please take note of how easily and neatly we can liberate the vital organs using modern equipment and know-how. To conclude, I would like to assure you all that I am a fully qualified surgeon and I can produce all the relevant paperwork if requested. I would also like to remind you all that you will not see this procedure performed often, as it has absolutely no medical value." |
|
|
|
Post by Tequilabot on Aug 31, 2004 10:11:34 GMT -5
Woo Yay !!!
Keep em coming hypnotator!!!
Frank don't look too clever now, but at least he can afford his council tax!
|
|
|
|
Post by orgonobot on Aug 31, 2004 11:02:51 GMT -5
Dr Benway would be proud of the advances of modern science  - push the frontiers further, hypnotator! |
|
|
|
Post by Arch Stanton on Aug 31, 2004 14:11:20 GMT -5
Does Nurse Klimt have any sisters? Or pets? I knew a Nurse Kklompt once but she was run over by med students for a laugh (by med students I mean medium students, not medical students you understand. Well, they told me they were medium students anyway)....
Is Frank common or garden?
|
|
|
|
Post by Asher on Sept 1, 2004 5:56:21 GMT -5
I look forward to the re-constitution of the the patient. Will they be all better?
|
|
|
|
Post by hypnotator on Sept 14, 2004 9:59:37 GMT -5
In the real world, my Visible Man is carefully reassembled and lovingly restored to his display spot, but in the story, I’m not too sure if Dr. Walder can be bothered, indeed, he probably forgot all about it and left poor old Frank on a trolley somewhere while he and Nurse Klimt went off to the canteen. That’s the NHS for you.
Well done, Orgonobot, I hoped someone would spot the line I pinched from WSB. I couldn’t resist it; it was so appropriate.
It’s funny you should ask, Arch, Nurse Klimt does have a sister, but you wouldn’t fancy her, believe me. Perhaps we can arrange to have the med students run her over. Frank is garden, not common. He is named after the Visible Man character in 2000AD. Nurse Klimt is named after a painting by Gustav Klimt.
I had so much fun taking these pictures. My wife came into the bedroom at one point while I was giggling over the poses. Her comment: “You’re not well!” Later, my son, 5, and daughter, 7, came in. My son took a look at disassembled Frank and said “He’s dead but he’s not dead.” He wanted to introduce his Scott Tracy figure to the “stage”. Should I have let him?
Dr. Walder will be back soon in a new adventure, “Gore Steed”.
Hypno
|
|
|
|
Post by Orbitron on Sept 27, 2004 10:38:34 GMT -5
It works now ;D
|
|
